i've decided that i hate my life | msterling45's Blog

i'm drunk and depressed

i've decided that i don't know how to connect with people

i have enough f*cking friends, i don't need anymore friends

people love to have me around because i'm edgy and i'm interesting and i turn your f*cking sh*tty party into a blast

but at the end of the night, no one ever wants to take me home

i'm fun to have sometimes have around - but no one wants me around all of the time

i can't help but feel that i have truly isolated myself

by educating myself, by asking questions, by not accepting the status quo - i have rendered myself completely unattractive to the opposite sex

before anyone chimes in with the f*cking lovey dovey sh*t - this is the internet, none of you know me in real life

none of you can touch me or hold me or snuggle with me after a bad day

and that's all i want in life - that's it - someone to f*cking love me and hold me and share affection with me

no words, just an understanding of me and accepting of me

the more i learn, the farther i get from this goal

i can't go back though

i'm destined to be alone, i know i am - i ask too many questions to live a f*cking happy, complacent life

i hate myself